Tuesday, May 1, 2012

There's no place like home

This mama bear was gone for the latter part of last week for a research conference. While I was excited to go off by myself, I missed my baby bear tremendously. I left Wednesday morning, but was still able to drop her off at preschool. I was prepared to stay around a little longer like she often wants me to do. But when we got to school, she told me to leave. I told her that I was going to be gone for a few days and that i would miss her. And she told me "Leave mama." Every other day, she asks for me to stay longer or has this tight grip on me and that day of all days, she told me to leave. I was a bit sad about that.

The conference took place near the San Francisco airport in Burlingame. Not the most exciting city. I did take some time to head out into the city the first afternoon with a couple of my students. It was a good conference and our presentations went really well. It was wonderful to get to sleep in a little and I actually got to the hotel gym as well. It was nice to have some alone time even though I was at a conference and working. Some times you really need the time to yourself to refresh and reset, though I was technically in work mode, I was only in work mode and not mommy or wife mode. All I had to take care of was myself. I had a few students at the conference, but they were all adults and I was not there to be there keepers, plus I have really great students so they don't need me for much. They were there to present our research and they did an amazing job at that. They made me proud. I was a proud mama (sometimes it is hard to kick off the mommy mode, hahaha).

Baby Bear was in capable hands with daddy and Grandma Bear was near by to lend a helping hand. So there were no worries. I just missed my girl. The first night I called Baby Bear and she asked me if I was on my way home. I explained to her where I was and that I would be home in a few days. The next couple of evenings, I Skyped in before her bedtime. It was great to see her sweet face even if it was just on the iPad. She blew me a ton of kisses and told me she could not hug me because I was in the TV. Each evening she asked me if I was coming home. I missed my girl.

I finally headed home on Saturday afternoon and it was so wonderful to have my little girl and daddy come to pick me up at the airport, Baby Bear ran to me as soon as she saw me. It is such an amazing feeling to be loved by such a sweet little one. I will never forget her face as she walked into the airport and saw me. Her eyes lit up and her little feet started running as fast as they could to get to me. It was just amazing. I missed her so much and she missed me too. You could just feel the love, it's a feeling I can't thoroughly explain but one that warms my heart and makes me feel so complete. It is what makes this thing called motherhood so amazing.

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