It was a wonderful year

What a year!! In 2009, I was forever changed when I was transformed into a Mama Bear, the most important role of my life.

For the beginning half of the year I was pregnant and in the second half Baby Bear came into my life. I was very fortunate to have a really great pregnancy. What an experience to watch you body change and grow and grow and grow. Wow, I was pretty huge at the end! Pregnancy is an amazing thing, it really truly is like nothing else. And of course there is the end product, my wonderful Baby Bear.

When Baby Bear entered my life she filled a void that I never even realized I had. I always knew that I wanted to be a mother, but I never knew the impact that it would have on me. I never knew how a tiny little girl could change my life forever. I never knew that she would make my life complete, she makes our family complete. She is my world and I look forward to the year ahead. I look forward to everything we will share as a family, I look forward to watching Baby Bear grow and develop. I know that 2010 will bring a lot of firsts for our family. 2010 will be a wonderful year. How can it not be with her in my life:

More first Christmas celebration

Every year, my very close friends have a Christmas party. We have been doing this for years and we have been friends since high school, so it is really so wonderful that after all these years we still are close friends and celebrate with each other. We have grown over the years, adding spouses and children, so we are now 12 adults and 12 children strong!

Look at all these kids!! Can't believe we got them all to sit still for this picture.



The adults get to sit and eat at a table together with nice china, which is very fun and something we don't get to do often. The kids get to eat together at the kids table. Next year Baby Bear will be able to join them. Look at how cute they are toasting each other. (This was totally their own spontaneous idea to toast, it was so cute!)



Of course, what the kids look forward to most is opening presents!! Because the number of kids have grown over the years, we now have the kids draw names. It is really fun to watch all the kids open their presents all at once. It is chaos, but so much fun. Besides what kid is patient enough to wait their turn to open their present.



Once the kids are done opening their gifts, they are off to play. Then the adults can play games. We have our own white elephant gift exchange and some other games. This year we played a Dress up Santa game. The prize, MONEY!! Papa Bear and I didn't win, but it was a ton of fun to play!







Christmas with good friends, what more could you want. What a wonderful first Christmas for Baby Bear!

Baby Bear's first Christmas Day

Got home from Christmas Eve around 2 am and luckily Baby Bear went right to sleep. She woke up around her regular time, which meant Mama Bear did not get to sleep in. When Papa Bear woke up, we saw that Santa had brought some gifts for us all. Looks like Baby Bear liked her gift from Santa.



Grandpa Bear came by and brought Baby Bear her presents:



Then we headed off to Grandma Bear's house for brunch and opened a few more presents. Baby Bear has been so totally spoiled with gifts for Christmas.



Then we head over to great aunt's house for Christmas dinner.



Baby Bear hung out with the cousins while I helped out in the kitchen. Papa Bear's cousins are pretty much all boys on Grandpa Bear's side of the family. The boys all love Baby Bear and enjoyed playing with her. I wish I had gotten some pictures of her with all the boys. She is actually the first girl from a long line of boys on Grandpa Bear's side of the family.





The great aunties are especially happy to have a baby girl in the family. Opening more presents. Baby Bear is so blessed to have such wonderful family.



Baby Bear had the most wonderful first Christmas. Great family just makes it all the best!!

Baby Bear's first Christmas Eve

Christmas was so much fun with Baby Bear. It was a very busy, busy 24 hours. My side of the family celebrates on Christmas Eve and we open presents at midnight! I guess it is tradition, but it is a little crazy. It was especially crazy with Baby Bear and knowing that we will have to celebrate with Papa Bear's side of the family the next day. Christmas is quite exhausting for the Bear family.

I put her to bed at her regular time and then had to wake her up after a few hours to dress her and go to my uncle's house. Luckily, Baby Bear has a wonderful demeanor and was in great spirits despite being so tired. With my family there are always lots of pictures taken. Baby Bear was a star and took pictures with lots of family:

with Lola Bear



with Lolo Bear



Uncle Bear came home from Seattle to see his niece for the first time. It is actually the first Christmas with my brother in 4 years!! It was so nice to have him home for the holidays.



with Great grandma



and with great aunties





Four generations of women



Christmas is all about family. We have an especially large family. My mom is the second of 7 children and pretty much all her brothers and sisters and their children (except my cousins who are in the Philippines and one cousin who has a newborn) were there to celebrate Christmas Eve. That makes for a lot of people. It is always fun to celebrate with Christmas Eve with all of the family. Although it was a tad bit stressful with Baby Bear, as a new parent it just seemed very irresponsible to have my baby up so late. I just wish we could celebrate a little earlier in the day, maybe next year? It is just very tiring, expecially since this was only the beginning of the celebration for us.

Here comes Santa Claus

Baby Bear did really well with Santa pictures. She even smiled for the picture! Yay!!



She is just so cute. Another good one. She looks like a doll.

Family is what the holidays are all about

We celebrated our first Christmas with Baby Bear and what a wonderful Christmas it was. It was busy and much more exhausting for me than any other year. I was in a rush to do everything and to get everything together for Baby Bear's first Christmas. Everything took more time to do. A few weeks ago I was freaking out because we had no Christmas tree; we had no decorations up, Baby Bear didn't have a picture with Santa, our Christmas cards were not sent out, and on and on it goes. I was a little stressed out to say the least. It is a little more work to get things together this time of year with a baby. I got holiday cards out. Baby Bear had her picture with Santa. We got our little tree just days before Christmas and I had to settle for a poorly decorated tree since all my ornaments are in storage (FYI: the tree in the picture was not our tree). It wasn't perfect and I didn't have the chance to decorate like I like to.

But when it came right down to it, Christmas was absolutely perfect because I had Baby Bear and Papa Bear with me and that was all that mattered. We were together and as long as we were together it didn't matter where we were or if we had all the Christmas decorations in the world. Christmas is about celebration and being with family. I love our little family and being with them was the best Christmas present I could ever get in my life.

I hope that everyone also had a very happy holidays with their loved ones.

2 years

Two years ago today our family experienced a sad and dark day. My sister in law was taken from us by cancer. Her memory is still very strong in our hearts and minds and will always be so. I am sad that Baby Bear will never get the chance to know her aunt, that she will never get to see the vibrant red head who would have loved and adored Baby Bear.

This time of year is bittersweet. I love the holiday season and celebrating Christmas, however the loss that we experienced at this time of year two years ago bring feelings of pain and sadness. We have her photo in our bedroom and on our fridge, so she is always with us in our hearts.

Tricia, you are not forgotten. You are always in our heart and memories. I think of you often and I miss you.

More teeth = crappy sleep

Baby Bear has two more teeth. They are the top "fang" teeth. It is funny since I thought she would get her top middle teeth before the fang ones. They have just broken the surface, which explains why she has been an awful sleeper at night. Poor thing has probably been in some pain. I hope she sleeps better soon, because I am one tired Mama Bear!

6 month well visit and vaccinations

Baby Bear is a healthy girl. She weighs 14 lbs 13 oz and is 25.25 inches long. She has doubled her birth weight. She is in the 30th and 25th percentile for weight and height, within the norm. Her weight gain has slowed and seems low to me, but the pediatrician is not worried and I just have to realize that she is petite like her mommy. No reason for me to worry at all. I think worrying is a natural part of mommyhood.

We were at the pediatrician's office for almost 2 hours! It was just ridiculous. I guess there must have been a lot of sick kids. I don't know for sure since there is a separate waiting room for sick kids and there were only a few kids in the waiting room we were in. Baby Bear got 4 shots and an oral vaccine and that was less than what she was scheduled to have since I asked the doctor to split them up a bit. Baby Bear will have to go back next month for 3 more shots. Yikes! My poor baby. She did get the regular flu shot and H1N1 flu shot. Since Baby Bear is in daycare a few days a week and around others quite a bit, I wanted to make sure she was well protected and up to date on her vaccinations. She did do very well though and the doctor said she looked really good. It is just so sad when she gets so upset because of the shots.

It's a beanie time of year

It has been getting cold and we have been out and about doing Holiday types of things, so it is time to bust out the beanies and hats that Baby Bear has. She had several that are just too small for her hear. Sadly, she never had a chance to wear them. She is growing way too fast. She looks so cute in her little beanies and she doesn't mind wearing them at all. That is a good thing so that we can keep her head nice and warm.

We went to the Christmas Parade in the downtown area Saturday night. Baby Bear was totally fascinated by the kids and the cars. Friday night we went to an artwalk and Christmas tree lighting. So lots of fun and a few later then usual nights for Baby Bear. It is so fun to celebrate the holidays with Baby Bear!!

6 months!

Looks who is half a year old! Wow, she's a big girl now. I know I am a little late with the pictures, but here they are.

6 months of motherhood

Papa Bear is just the sweetest! He surprised me by coming to my office and bringing me a flower to celebrate 6 months of motherhood. I thought of today as Baby Bear's day, not so much mine. I love Papa Bear, he is just so thoughtful and wonderful. I am a lucky Mama Bear!! A great baby and a great husband. What more can a momma want?

My letter to Baby Bear on her 6 month birthday

Dear Baby Bear,

Six months ago you entered into the world and filled a void in my life I never even knew existed. You have brought nothing but joy and happiness into my life. The love that I have for you is unlike any kind of love that I have ever felt or experienced. These 6 months have been amazing as I have watched you grow and develop. Each day, each week, each month there have been so many wonderful changes and challenges that we have encountered together. You have taught me so much about life and what is truly important.

So much has happened in this short time and I just want to take it all in and cherish every moment I have with you. You are no longer the tiny little newborn Papa Bear and I brought home 6 months ago. You have blossomed into this wonderful little baby girl with so much personality. Your big bright eyes coupled with you wonderful smile brighten up a room. Everyone who meets you is instantly entranced by you.

Each day is a new adventure for us. Some days are easy and some days are challenges, but all days with you are amazing and wonderful. I cherish every moment we spend together as a family. You have transformed me into a mommy and I promise to do my best to be the best mommy to you that I can be. Motherhood is new to me, but it is a challenge that I fully embrace. I am so lucky that I get to be your mommy. I love being your mommy.

I love you and I will always love you. I will always be here for you, I will always do my best to give you everything you need, I will always do my best to be the best mommy I can be. You deserve the best.

Love always and forever,
Mama Bear

A week of firsts

A lot of first happened for Baby Bear last week. Her first taste of solid food. Her first Thanksgiving. Her first river trip.

Baby Bear's First Tastes

We introduced solid foods to Baby Bear last Tuesday. We wanted to give it a try before Thanksgiving so that she could eat Thanksgiving with us. I made some sweet potato and that was her first food. We gave it a shot, she wasn't too keen on it and made many different faces. So sweet potato is not her favorite. We will try something else this week and see how that goes.











Baby Bear's First Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving was a blast. Baby Bear got to see a lot of family. It was a very fun Thanksgiving with lots of great food.











Baby Bear's First River Trip

The Friday after Thanksgiving we headed out to the river (Colorado River). We had no idea what to expect with Baby Bear's first long car ride. Baby Bear was awesome, she slept most of the way and we had one pit stop to eat and change diapers. She was such a trooper. She had a great time and we had a wonderful time with friends. One the way home, we hit a lot of traffic and again Baby Bear was wonderful. It was a successful first vacation for us as a family. I am sure this is only the beginning of many more river trips to come.

Gobble, gobble, gobble. Happy Thanksgiving

Baby Bear's first Thanksgiving!! We are very excited to celebrate this Thanksgiving with our beautiful baby. I have so much to be thankful for this year, especially with Baby Bear in our lives.

I am so thankful to have Baby Bear in my life and thankful to be her mommy. She is just so amazing and lights up my world. Her beautiful smile and her voice brings so much sunshine into my life. Being a mother is the most amazing role I have ever had and the most important thing I have ever done in my life. Yes, it has changed me. It has changed me for the better. I love it and I am so fortunate to be Baby Bear's mother.

I am thankful to have such a wonderful husband. Papa Bear is so good to me and is a wonderful daddy. He loves us so much and I am thankful that he is so involved in his daughter's life. I love seeing how he absolutely adores her. Our biggest disagreement since she was born is who's daughter she is. He insists that she is his baby and I argue that she is all mine!! But I guess I will share her.

I am thankful to have great parents. My parents and my in-laws are wonderful grandparents. They are respectful of our parenting and they just love Baby Bear. Both grandmothers care for her once a week. It is so nice that Baby Bear is able to grow up with and bond with her grandmothers. The grandfathers just dote on her and love her. We are fortunate that they are in our lives and will be in Baby Bear's life.

I am thankful for my friends. I am blessed to have so many wonderful people in my life who care so much about Baby Bear and me. They do so much for me and are the best.

I am thankful for our health. I am thankful that Baby Bear is healthy and growing strong. She is meeting her milestones and each day continues to develop and thrive. It is so wonderful to see her change. She is growing up way too fast, but it is also awesome to see her reach a new milestone and learn new things.

Life is good and there is so much to be thankful for. Happy Thanksgiving to all.

Angel Baby

Yesterday, I celebrated my lola's birthday. Today I mourn the loss of an angel baby. I learned that yesterday was also the day that a beautiful baby was born and died. After 30 hours of labor, my best friend delivered her baby girl and she weighed just under 1 pound. It appears that the umbilical cord had wrapped itself around her neck.

My heart goes out to the beautiful angel baby that I did not have the chance to meet. Angel baby even though you were not my baby, you are in my heart. I love you even though I did not get to know you. You are loved and will always be loved by many.

Happy Birthday Great-Lola!!

Yesterday was my lola's 89th birthday! Doesn't she look amazing for 89 years old.



My lola is the only living grandparent for Papa Bear and I. Baby Bear enjoyed seeing her great-lola and I know my lola loved seeing Baby Bear.

My lola helped to raise me and has always been a special force in my life. I am so fortunate to have grown up with my lola in my life. Being the first born grandchild in the U.S., I have spent almost all my life with lola in it. She has been there through so much and has watched me grow and I am so blessed to have had that opportunity. I know many people grow up with their grandparents living far away or not having even know their grandparents. I didn't just see my lola on holidays, I saw her on a regular basis and she helped to raise me and make me into the person I have become. She is a strong woman and I hope that I have the same qualities that she has. I am so glad that Baby Bear is able to have her in her life. Happy Birthday lola!! Here is to another wonderful year and many more to come! I love you!

Feelings of sorrow and devestation

Tonight I received an awful phone call from my best friend's mom. She was about 7 months pregnant and the baby girl she was carrying in her womb no longer had a heartbeat. She was not ready to talk to anyone quite yet but wanted to let me know what had happened. My heart broke when I heard this news. I was devastated for my friend and I just wanted to hug her. But I want to respect her wishes and give her the space and time she needs with her family. I can only imagine what she is going through. I believe that she will have to deliver the baby and the baby will have to be named with a birth and death certificate. I am filled with so much sorrow.

My best friend was pregnant with a baby girl. This was her third child and although she was surprised when she found out she was pregnant, she was excited and embraced having another child. I remember when she first told me she was pregnant again. It was just weeks after Baby Bear was born. I was so excited and secretly hoped that she would have another girl (she has a 6 year old boy and a 4 year old girl) so that our little girls could grow up together as we did. And she was indeed going to have a little girl. I just talked to her last week and all was well. I don't know why this happened.

I have known my dearest friend since I was in the 7th grade and she was in 8th grade. We met when I made the drill team. She was a year older than me and my lieutenant in drill team. But, it wasn't really until high school that we really became very close friends; we were in drama and Chamber Singers together. We spent a lot of time together in rehearsals. I remember being so sad when she graduated from high school and left me behind. Fortunately, she never really left me behind. Our friendship continued to grow and we have been through heartaches with boys, college graduations, and watch each other get married and have children. She was my matron of honor and I just asked her to be Baby Bear's Godmother. She is such a special person in my life and my heart aches for my friend and her loss. I am so sad.

There has been too much loss this year; this needs to stop!

Recycle Huggies packaging

I just learned from the blogosphere that I can help the environment even though I am using disposable diapers. Huggies teamed up with TerraCycle to help reduce the impact its packaging has on the environment. TerraCycle converts plastic waste diaper packaging into new products like tote bags, pencil cases, and other cool items! They also convert other packaging as well, like oreo packaging and candy wrappers. What a great idea!

I had contemplated cloth diapering, but couldn't quite make the commitment. Especially now that I am back to work, I find it a little daunting to go for it. So we are sticking with disposables for now. Baby Bear is not totally particular to a brand of diapers. I do like the Pampers Swaddlers but we also use Huggies since we received free Huggies diapers from the Ellen Show. Here is a good opportunity to be good to our environment in a small way.

Learn more here.

Sick baby update

Baby Bear is doing much better today. Her fever is down. Her nose is still runny and snotty. When she finally went down to sleep last night, she slept well. Poor baby had a hard time getting to sleep because of her stuffed up nose.

I am glad my baby is starting to feel better. On the other hand, my other baby, Papa Bear, seems to have caught Baby Bear's cold and he is the biggest baby of them all. As for me, I think I am okay but I am running on empty. I am exhausted and a bit of a zombie. I am so tired, I need to go back to sleep. Too bad I have to go to work today.

Baby Bear is sick

For the first time in her life, my Baby Bear is sick. She has a low grade fever, a runny nose, and a cough. She has been off all day long and fussy. My poor baby. She can barely breathe through her nose, she is so stuffy. I feel so bad and wish I can make it all better. I am going to stay home from work tomorrow to cuddle and take care of my baby. Feel better soon my baby.

Baby Bear's first walk!

On Saturday, we walked for Autism and raise $290. We had a great time (even if Baby Bear slept through half of the walk).

Baby Bear was all geared up for her first walk.





She even got to talk a picture with some Star Wars storm troopers.



Thank you to everyone who supported Baby Bear and I on our walk for Autism.