Showing posts with label breastfeeding. Show all posts
Showing posts with label breastfeeding. Show all posts

Friday, April 15, 2011

No more Mama Milk

Our breastfeeding days are done. It has been a week since Baby Bear asked for "mama milk." We had gone down to breastfeeding only one time a day, every morning around 5:30am the about a month ago, I would give her a choice between a bottle and "mama milk" and she stopped asking for "mama milk" about a week ago. We went 22 months of breastfeeding. I first started with a goal of 1 year and made it that far. After Baby Bear turned a year, she was no where near ready to stop. I decided to stop pumping at work at about 15 months, and used up the last bag of pumped milk just before 18 months. We continued to breastfeed in the morning and evenings and weekends until 19 months. Then we went to just morning and night, then just mornings in the last couple of months. I did not actively wean her, it just gradually moved that way. Now we are done and a part of me is sad but I am also happy that my body is my own again. For 31 months, my body was not just my own. I had to watch what I put in my body because it didn't just impact me, but also Baby Bear for 9 months of pregnancy and then 22 months of breastfeeding. I am proud of myself for sticking to it, even through the difficulties of breastfeeding. I am thankful that I was blessed with the oppourtunity to provide Baby Bear the very best.

Monday, November 22, 2010

the last bag of pumped milk

Today we used the last bag of pumped milk. I stopped pumping in September and today used the last bit of pumped milk. In a strange way it seems like a milestone for me. I had pumped enough breastmilk to last almost 18 months (she turns 18 months next week). That just seems crazy. Baby Bear still nurses at night and in morning and on weekends. She shows no signs of weaning anytime soon, so for now we keep going. I have mixed feelings about this. I really want my body back but I also want to give her what she needs. There are just days when I want so much to be done. But then I think how this is just a tiny fraction of my life and she is getting so much out of it. Before I know it Baby Bear will be all grown up, so this is a small inconvenience that is worth it. Because she is so worth it all.

Monday, June 7, 2010

Trials and tribulations of breastfeeding.

No one ever really tells you how hard breastfeeding is. I took a breastfeeding class when I was pregnant and read up on it, but none of that really prepares you for it. It is interesting that something so natural can be so challenging, but then again having a baby is no walk in the park. I am very fortunate to have been able to breastfeed for a year. I met my goal and it was not an easy task.

I count myself as being very fortunate to have had a lot of support during this breastfeeding adventure. In the beginning, it was absolutely exhausting and Baby Bear was feeding constantly and I was a bit discouraged. Luckily, I was able to use the feeding clinic near me and see a lactation consultant on a regular basis (for free!). I started off going to the clinic a few times a week until I got the hang of it and then weekly for weight checks and support. I had a lot of questions and having that support and resource available to me really helped me out. It helped me as I worked on introducing the bottle to Baby Bear before I returned to work. That was another huge struggle. They helped me as I dealt with my clogged duct. They helped me as I prepared to return to work and pump while at work.

I know how hard it is to breastfeed and even after a year it is still a challenge. Two weeks ago, I developed a milk blister and it was so painful to nurse. I believe I might have developed an infection, because I had a fever and chills a week later, which I think had to do with the milk blister.

I have met my goal and now I am at the point where I am considering my next steps. A few weeks ago we introduced whole milk to Baby Bear and I started to supplement her daycare bottles with whole milk. Although I still have a freezer supply, it is slowly being used and my milk supply has been decreasing. I also got my period back which has impacted my supply, although I have been quite irregular. I hope to stop pumping at work. Pumping is a lot of work and I certainly won't miss that.

So I have set some new goals for myself: I am going to reduce my pumping schedule from 3 times a day to 2 times a day for this month and then to once a day in July. That will make a huge difference. I plan to eliminate all pumping by September.

I'll continue to give Baby Bear half expressed breast milk and whole milk until I have no more breast milk to give her. That will probably be through the summer. I would like to wean Baby Bear from bottles during the day and get her onto sippy cups. I plan to continue to nurse at night and in the morning for a little longer. I haven't decided how much longer, we will see how it goes.
Since Baby Bear is not the best eater of solid foods and isn't taking to keenly to the sippy cup, this process may take awhile for us. We just have to take it one step at a time.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Don't cry over spilled milk

My breast pump is officially dead. I tried to use it this morning and there was no suction. I boxed up my pump and sent it off to Lansinoh. I am so glad they will replace the motor. I just hope the turn around time to get the new motor is pretty quick. It is hard to be without a breast pump when you use it daily.

Luckily, I am able to borrow my friend's pump again (Thank you so much, TK!!!). We have different pump schedules so that works out; she pumps in the evenings and I pump during the day. So we are tag teaming the pump motor. It is also a good thing that the pump is a closed system (as opposed to other pumps that are open systems and can not be shared) so we don't have to worry about any hygienic issues since the milk never comes in any contact with the tubing or the motor.

It will all work out. Whew! I am still going to get a manual pump as a back-up. I should have gotten one a long time ago and intended to do so but never got around it. Now I really have no choice.

To top off all my pumping drama, after my morning pump I spilled some of my hard work. I spilled some breastmilk!! No I didn't "cry over the spilled milk," but I definitely came close to it. Baby Bear better appreciate the fact that I work hard to feed her breastmilk. This breastfeeding thing is no easy task!

Monday, January 25, 2010

Papa Bear broke my pump!

After just writing about pumping at work, I come to work this morning and find that my pump is sounding kind of strange. Last week, Papa Bear moved my bag which contained my pump and as he was moving my bag, my pump fell and dropped. I didn't think anything about it since I don't pump on the weekends. So when it came time to pump this morning I realized that my pump is not so happy. It is making a strange noise and when I shake it there is something loose inside. Luckily, it seemed to work just fine today despite the sound and a strange moving part.

I called customer service today and they are going to replace the pump motor. Whew! I didn't really want to have to purchase another pump since I only have about 4 more months of pumping left.

My very good friend was kind enough to lend me her pump today, just in case. I did use it for my last pump in the afternoon and you can definitely tell a difference in the sound and suction. I also will get a manual pump asap to get me through since I have to mail the old pump motor before I can get the new motor. It is probably a good idea to have a manual pump just in case anyways. What an ordeal! Just when I think things are going smoothly in the pumping arena, a wrench gets thrown in. At least things are going to work out just fine.

Pumping at work

I've pumped over 6 gallons of breastmilk since Baby Bear was born!! Wow! Over 4 gallons of that have been pumped at work.

I've been back to work for over 3 months and I think that I have been successfully pumping at work. It is not always easy and there isn't a day that I am concerned about my supply. So far, I have been able to maintain a decent supply and pump enough for Baby Bear to consume while I am gone. But there are days that my supply is on the lower side. Luckily, I developed a pretty good freezer stash before going back to work to help on days when my supply is a bit low.

Pumping at work is no easy task, but I am determined to breastfeed for at least a year and since I work that means I have to pump as well. Fortunately, my job is very work-family friendly. I have my own office so my employer does not have to provide me with a separate space for pumping and my schedule is flexible so pumping breaks are not a big issue. Some things that every working mother who plans to pump should remember, look into your rights. Most states have laws specifically allowing women a private space and break time to pump at work.

Although it isn't always easy or fun to pump, there are definitely things that have made it bearable and easier. Here are things that have helped me be relatively successful pumping at work:
  • Block time and set reminders on your calendar. This way it is on your schedule and it keeps you from scheduling meetings during those times. Sometimes, I move my blocks around a bit in certain cases, but for the most part I pump three times a day at relatively the same time of day (9:30am, 12:30pm, and 3:30pm). I put those times on my Outlook calendar and my calendar reminds me that it is time to pump.
  • Always pump in the mornings when your supply is at its highest. I always get the most output in the mornings, so I often pump a little longer in the mornings (and there are those rare moments when I get a second let down). My supply decreases a bit through out the day, but in general my daily output is pretty consistent.
  • Pump for every feeding that you miss. If possible pump one extra time to help build your freezer stash. I started my building my freezer stash while I was on maternity leave and rotate my stash so that I freeze one bottle a day and Baby Bear gets a bottle of older frozen breast milk from the freezer stash. This way the older milk doesn't expire before you can use it. (Look here for guidelines on storing and freezing breast milk). I learned this after having to trash some of my breast milk, that was heartbreaking to trash the breast milk I worked so hard to pump.
  • Pump for at least 15 minutes or 2-3 minutes after the last drop of milk has been expressed. This will trigger your breasts to produce more milk. It is all based on supply and demand.
  • Have a picture of your baby with you to induce a quicker letdown. I have Baby Bear's picture on my monitor background. It also helps to think about your baby and relax as you are pumping.
  • Relax, relax, relax. I find that if I am stressed or preoccupied my pump output suffers. So it is so important to relax.
  • Pack your pump bag the night before to make sure you have everything you'll need. You are less in a rush to get out the door in the morning with your baby. I try to get everything ready at night once Baby Bear has gone down to sleep, so that the mornings are less hectic.
Baby Bear is almost 8 months old, which means I have at least 4 more months of pumping to meet my goal. Once I meet my 1 year goal, I will reassess from there. I don't know if I will necessarily wean Baby Bear at that time, but I would like to see I can at least reduce pumping sessions. I'll have to see how Baby Bear does and follow her lead on that one. I wouldn't mind breastfeeding past the 1 year mark, I just would like to not have to pump as much. I guess we'll see how things go.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Back to work

My maternity leave ends in about 1 month. I am very fortunate to have been on leave for as long as I have been on leave. I know there are many women out there who have to return to work very soon after giving birth. In total, I will have had 21 weeks of maternity leave (3 week before birth and 18 weeks after). I will go back to work 4 days a week since I still have my California Paid Family Leave that I am able to use and I will use that one day a week until it is all used up.

I am looking forward to going back to work. Yes, I love spending all this time with Baby Bear. But I enjoy my work and co-workers and looking forward to adult conversations. I am looking forward to the routine of work and the challenges of my job. I look forward to having some time away from home for a little bit.

I love spending time with Baby Bear and I will miss her during the day. She is just such a wonderful baby; she is happy and smiles and so cute! I absolutely love her. But I will be a happier mama bear and a better mother by going back to work and having some time to myself.

I know that it will definitely be challenging being a working mother. I am already so tired and sleep deprived without the challenges of working and parenting. It will definitely be an adjustment for me. It will be an adjustment for Baby Bear to be away from me for so long (especially since she is still on bottle strike). I suspect that it will be harder for me than it will for her. She will be in child care 2 days a week and then spend a day with Grandma Bear and another day with Lola Bear. It will be wonderful for her to spend time with both grandmothers and I know they will both enjoy it.

I especially worry about Baby Bear being able to eat since she is on bottle strike. I have spoken with my lactation consultant and with my child care provider and both have assured me that she will not starve. She may end up eating more in the evenings and in the morning to compensate for eating less during the day. On days that she is in child care, I will be able to nurse her during my lunch breaks. The rest of the time I will have to pump. Since my goal is to breastfeed for 1 year, I hope that I can successfully continue to pump and keep my supply up. There is always something new in my adventures with Baby Bear. Never a dull moment!

Friday, July 31, 2009

Breast Ultrasound update

I had my breast ultrasound on Tuesday and it is not cancer. I was a little worried since I have a family history of breast cancer. The radiologist said it is a clogged duct or mastitis (even though I didn't have any of the symptoms) and that I should just continue to feed Baby Bear as I have been and let her do her job so that it will work itself out. The lump is smaller but it is still there. I guess because it was so big it will just take time to get rid of it. It hasn't affected my milk supply or flow in any way. In fact, it seems that that breast produces more milk and often times sprays Baby Bear when she latches off that breast. The joys of breastfeeding!

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Bottle Strike

Baby Bear is on bottle strike for the last 2 days. She refuses to take the bottle. Papa Bear has been feeding Baby Bear every night for the last week and a half. Then yesterday she decided that she did not want anything to do with a bottle. Papa Bear tried and then I tried, after she started screaming at the bottle I gave in and gave her the breast. Again today she would not take the bottle. Grandma Bear tried to give her a bottle while I was at an appointment and she would not take it. Ugh!!!

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Postpartum: 6 weeks

I had my postpartum appointment yesterday. I have the okay to exercise and do most anything I did pre-pregnancy. I am excited to get back to working out. I have been walking and hopefully now I can do a little more, of course I don't know where I will find the time to do that now. It has been so hot that it is hard to go for walks with Baby Bear. Tomorrow, I will attempt to go to yoga again and leave Baby Bear with Papa Bear. I am looking forward to that. Hopefully, I will be able to get in more exercise. I am really eager to start a more regular routine, I just hope I can make it work with Baby Bear.

I still have the plugged duct in my right breast and I went to be seen by the dr. last week. I was given an antibiotic to treat mastitis. I never had a fever or developed any other flu-like symptoms. It is not as painful as it used to be and it doesn't appear to be as red, so maybe it is just taking time for the antibiotics to work. It is hard to tell if it has gotten any smaller and the plugged duct hasn't fully resolved. At my appointment yesterday my OB ordered a breast ultrasound just to be on the safe side. Hopefully it will resolve and all will be well. My ultrasound is next week.

I also talked with my OB about birth control. Right now I don't know if we will have another child. I always thought that I would like two children and Papa Bear is content with one. We will see in few years how we feel. For now, I want to make sure there are no surprises. My OB gave me a prescription for the mini-pill, which is safe to take while breastfeeding. I also asked him about an IUD; there are two types the non-hormonal and the hormonal type. I am going to look a little more into it, but that is another option. We'll see what is right for me.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Operation Bottle II = SUCCESS!

We tried the bottle again tonight. This time I stayed home just in case. It took a little while, but Baby Bear took the bottle and went to town with it. Whew!

We are going to give her in the evenings to get her used to it. I am not going back to work for another 12 weeks, but she needs to get used to the bottle at some point and this gives Papa Bear and her some time together as well.

Monday, July 13, 2009

More on breastfeeding

Breastfeeding is not easy that is for sure. I have a plugged duct on my right breast. I have had it for almost 2 weeks now and I can't seem to get rid of it. I have followed the advice of my lactation consultant at the feeding clinic and the information found on kellymom.com, yet it hasn't relieved itself. I do a hot compress, massage the lump, and have Baby Bear empty the breast or pump to empty the breast if she doesn't do it.

I am worried that if it doesn't get any better that it will become infected and turn into mastitis. It hurts when I massage it each time that Baby Bear eats, but I also know I have to be aggressive in treating it so I massage it through the pain. My postpartum appointment is in a week so if it doesn't get better I am going to have to talk to my doctor about it. The joys of breastfeeding!! It is just not joyous or fun. I am a cow for my baby!! I hope it gets better and easier. I really want to continue to breastfeed but there are days I want to stop. I am just taking it week by week but my ultimate goal is to make it for a year (I'll be happy if I do 6 mos.). Baby Bear is doing so well; she is gaining weight and doing so well. I can't believe that she is already 9 lbs. 11 oz. She is becoming my little chunky bear. I love it!! She is just the best!!

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Operation Bottle = FAIL

Last night, Papa Bear stayed home with Baby Bear while I went to a yoga class. It was so nice to have an hour or so all to myself. I left a bottle of pumped breast milk with Papa Bear and fed Baby Bear before I left. So we were all set, or so I thought. Baby Bear was fussy all day and that should have been a clue that she probably would not take to a bottle. A half hour after I left she was unhappy and would not take the bottle and nothing that Papa Bear did would soothe her. I came home to a crying baby. I breastfed her and she was fine for a short time. She was fussy up until she went to bed.

She also had a rough night. At 4am she woke up screaming and was fussy and would barely eat. We finally got her to sleep. In the morning, repeat of the night before. Until she finally threw up all over Papa Bear. She must have had an upset tummy and then I also noticed that she had an awful diaper rash. Poor baby! She is much better since throwing up and now sleeping. We will have to try the bottle again another time and another attempt at being able to go out on my own. Hopefully the next attempt will work out much better.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Breastfeeding Update

We went to the breastfeeding clinic this morning and Baby Bear has surpassed her birth weight!! She is now 7 lbs. 11 oz. Yay!! She is growing so fast. That is great news and I am weaning her off supplementing with the tube. I will only supplement at night with my expressed breast milk. Supplementing was a pain since it was so hard to get the tube in her mouth while she was on the breast, so I am glad that I can start to wean her off of that. I will continue to pump in the mornings so that I can keep up my supply and have the expressed breast milk when I supplement in the evenings. I am so glad that breastfeeding is getting better and that Baby Bear is getting more from me now.

It is still hard and work in the sense that my body is not mine and I have to feed her every couple of hours. So it is hard to get time to do things between feedings. It is all worth it I know and I am so glad I am able to breastfeed.

Friday, June 12, 2009

Breastfeeding

I knew from the very beginning that I really wanted to breastfeed. There are so many benefits to doing so. But I also knew that although it was a very natural thing, it could be very difficult. I had no idea how difficult it was going to be. The first time just after birth, Baby Bear latched on right away and I felt very positive that this would work out. But in those first few days before my milk came in, it was very challenging. I was feeding her constantly; 2 hour feeding session with little break in between otherwise, she would fuss unless I breastfed or we held her. She slept very little. I was exhausted and had pretty much no sleep. The thought of breastfeeding around the clock was discouraging. I kept on going through the weekend until I was able to go see a lactation consultant at the breastfeeding clinic that my hospital referred me to. I was fortunate that the clinic was free and very close to home.

The lactation consultants at the clinic helped me tremendously. Immediately after going to the clinic the first time Baby Bear was a happier and easy baby. She didn't have to be held constantly and she actually slept in her bassinet rather than sleeping on Papa Bear or me. The problem was that she had not been getting enough milk from me. I just wasn't producing enough for her. So the lactation consultant had me supplement her feedings using a supplemental nursing system (SNS), which is a tube feeding system. The tube is inserted in her mouth as she is on the breast and allows her to get my breast milk and some formula. Initially I supplemented with formula and began to pump, so that I could supplement with breast milk rather than formula.

So that first week home, I went to the clinic 3 times and Baby Bear gained weight; she gained 10 oz. 3 days and was one ounce from her birth weight. That was a good sign considering that she had lost 10% of her birth weight. Now I am supplementing every other feeding and I am continuing to pump so that I can keep my supply up. I figure eventually I can freeze what I pump so that eventually Papa Bear can give her a bottle in about a month or so.

I plan to continue to utilize the breastfeeding clinic and go twice a week. It is such a great resource. The weigh Baby Bear before I feed her and then again afterward so that we can see how much she is getting from me. Hopefully, my supply will continue to grow and I can wean her off the SNS. If it weren't for the lactation consultants and the clinic, I might have been so discouraged with breastfeeding. I think I will be able to continue now and hopefully do so for the first year of Baby Bear's life. I feel like it is getting better.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Breastfeeding Class

Last night, I attended a breastfeeding class at the hospital where I will deliver. I felt that it was a pretty informative class. I have no clue about breastfeeding, except for the benefits and that I plan to breastfeed. The class went over different ways to hold the baby, ways to relieve engorgement, how to detect a baby's feeding cues, nutrition, and had lots of tips and recommendations.

My plan is to breastfeed for the first year if possible. Once I return to work, I will pump and the class gave recommendations on when to start pumping and introducing the bottle to baby to ease in that transition. That was very informative. They also gave some recommendations on equipments and accessories to help a new mother be successful in breastfeeding.

I realize that some women cannot breastfeed for various reason, but I do hope that I will be able to do so. I didn't realize that there was so much to breastfeeding, you would think that something so natural would be so easy. I guess it is not always easy for all women and takes some time for baby and mommy. Luckily, the hospital where I deliver encourages and supports breastfeeding. There is a lot of support systems in place at the hospital to help new mothers to successfully breastfeed. The have a center devoted to provide support to new mothers. I have a feeling I will be taking advantage of that especially since it is walking distance from my house. I guess we'll see how Baby Bear and I do in a few months from now.